scam [skam] noun: a dishonest scheme; a scheme for making money by dishonest means.

There aren't too many things that piss me off more then someone scamming an unsuspecting person out of money. This is occurring right now on eBay. It started a while ago with one asshole selling a 'Timing Advance Kit' and a 'Cooling System Mod'. Today, there's a bunch of assholes getting into the act... all scamming people.

The claims are total lies. You will NOT get anywhere near 20hp from these modifications, as the ads claim. These seller are con-artists looking to make money off of people's ignorance. One seller in particular has sold hundreds of these kits and has made thousands of dollars off people by selling JUNK. The kits consist of 50¢ worth of parts and he sells them under erroneous claims for anywhere from $20 to $70.

Do not get conned by these people and do not buy any of this junk.

The Scam
The scams are all basically the same...

The Ad
If you read through the ads that they post, you'll notice that they all read basically the same. Here I'll focus on the 'Timing Advance Kit'... this kit consists of a resistor... that's it. By installing the resistor between the ECU and the air temperature sensor, the ECU will be tricked into thinking the air temperature is lower then it actually is. As a result, the ECU advances the timing and leans out the air/fuel ratio. This could possibly yield one or two horsepower at best, but certainly nowhere near the claim of 20hp. The following is one of the ads posted by a scam seller... I'll break it down line-by-line.

You are bidding on a timing advance modification kit for all models of [name of car].

This line should actually read '...modification kit for all cars.'. This is because the 'kit' is identical for every car.

This do-it-yourself kit takes no knowledge of cars and is extremely easy to install. This kit requires detailed insrtuctions with pictures and the wire and mod kit to hook into your engine. This will tap into your engines computer and tell it that cooler air is entering the car, which results in more horsepower (up to 20 more!) and more torque and better acceleration.

Tap into your engine's computer? This makes the 'kit' seem more intricate then it actually is... actually it's closer to a lie then a dramatization. All it does is trick the computer by altering a signal from a sensor. The claims of up to 20 horsepower is absolutely ridiculous.

This is exactly what those expensive chips do...for a fraction of the cost.

First, this is NOT exactly what the 'expensive' chips do... those chips directly alter the ECU's program to modify the fuel curve and timing... this 'kit' is just a signal altering gimmick. Second, it's pretty ironic that this idiot calls the chips 'expensive' when he's the one selling 20¢ resistors for $50 each.

This will release the potential of your engine.

Wow! Not bad for a 20¢ resistor. This line shows how the seller is willing to say ANYTHING to get people to buy his junk.

Remember that car makes must limit power on engines due to legal regulations. This is one of those modifications that takes that legal barrier off and allows your engine to breathe and go faster than before...it is 100% safe for your car, and can be removed anytime (if you are worried about your warranty) without any damage! It's that simple!

Advancing the timing can cause idle problems as well as engine detonation. Not exact 100% safe, but this guy couldn't care less if your entire car blew up.

This is great for stock or modified [name of car]'s, and it will give you that extra boost that you'll feel when you beat that other guy you're racing.

Holy crap! The bullshit is piling sky-high.

This is similar to nascar and formula one racing cars techniques on the track...watch your quarter mile times increase.

This line was added by the seller in order to guarantee his place in hell.

You don't need any tools to install it and you can do it in your driveway in less than 5 minutes! I did this mod to my car as well, trust me, you can feel the difference when you hit the gas...shipping is $3.00 in the U.S. and I accept money order, personal check, and PayPal. There is NO RESERVE! Good luck and happy bidding everyone!

Of course it takes less then 5 minutes to install... it's a RESISTOR! $3 shipping is the second part of his scam. How much do you really think it costs to ship a resistor through the mail? Drop it in an envelope and place a 34¢ stamp on it. Lastly, he lets everyone know that there's no reserve price on the auction... that's because if he sells the 'kit' for the opening price of $1, he makes a $3.50 profit between the resistor and shipping.

The Common Link
The common link between all sellers is blatantly obvious.